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Home IELTS Writing

The best way to reduce the crime rate is to educate criminals while they are still in prison

9IELTS by 9IELTS
July 1, 2022
in IELTS Writing, Agree or Disagree Essays, IELTS Writing Task 2
Reading Time: 11 mins read
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You should spend about 40 minutes on IELTS writing task 2.

Studies show that crime rates are lower among those with educational degrees. Therefore, the best way to reduce the crime rate is to educate criminals while they are still in prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Sample Answer 1

Undoubtedly, lack of education and employment opportunities are two of the primary causes behind the alarmingly increasing crime rates. Therefore, some people believe that merely educating criminals can discourage them from committing further crimes once they are out of prison. In my opinion, I believe it is true, and I agree with this view. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I will be explaining my views.

As they say, nobody is a born criminal. Most of the time, people become victims of their situations, turning toward this wrong path. In fact, most of the people have poor strata as their backgrounds; hence, they don’t get to have proper education. This results in lesser employment opportunities as well. Eventually, many of them turn into gangsters or thieves. In contrast, such criminal tendencies can be seen lower in those who are educated.

Educating convicted criminals in prison will certainly not erase their shoddy past. However, it improves their chances of finding employment once they get released. One of the biggest problems that ex-prisoners face is the lack of rehabilitation opportunities. Society prefers to keep them at arm’s length, and as such, they have fewer opportunities for making a living once they complete their sentence. Unfortunately, this increases their chances of getting into crime again. Education may change the situation for good. If prisoners receive an opportunity to learn and acquire vocational or academic degrees from prison, they are more likely to find employment upon their release. When they have a secure job and a means of living, most people will not want to get into crime again.

However, in a way, it might also be true that mentality plays an essential role in the behaviour of a person; education is one such thing that leaves a significant impression behind.

To conclude, education improves a person’s employability. Just because someone is a prisoner, it does not mean that they cannot learn or acquire degrees. In fact, educating prisoners is one of the best things we can do for their rehabilitation and successful induction into society.

Structure of the essay

You were given an opinion essay which means you had to pick a side. So,

  • Do you agree that to reduce the crime rate, it is better to educate criminals while they are still in prison?

(or)

  • Do you disagree with the fact that to reduce the crime rate, it is better to educate criminals while they are still in prison?

Once you pick a side, you can start planning your essay and then writing it.

Don’t forget to state your opinion on it.

Question Paraphrased – Lack of education and employment opportunities are two of the primary causes behind the alarmingly increasing crime rates.

Opinion – In my opinion, I believe it is true and I agree with this view.

A thesis statement – In the forthcoming paragraphs, I will be explaining my views.

Body Paragraph 1:

Topic: Nobody is a born criminal

Supporting points:

  • People become victims of their situations
  • People have poor strata as their backgrounds
  • They don’t get to have proper education
  • Results in lesser employment opportunities

Body Paragraph 2:

Topic: Educating convicted criminals will improve their chances of finding employment

Supporting points:

  • Lack of rehabilitation opportunities
  • Fewer opportunities for making a living once they complete their sentence
  • Education can change the situation
  • Receiving vocational and academic degrees from prison increases the chances of employment

Conclusion:

Reiterated that education improves a person’s employability and supported the side taken in the introduction.

Sample Answer 2

Research has shown that educational level is a key determiner of potential criminal behaviour, leading many to suggest reorienting prisons to focus on helping inmates earn degrees. In my opinion, this approach would be ineffective relative to other measures.

Reformers point to the bulk of studies supporting this practice. The last 50 years have witnessed a growth in prison programs funded by federal governments and private activists aiding prisoners earning either a high school or university degree. Tracking those who are released with a degree compared to those without has shown a marked decrease in reoffenders among the former group. The reasons for this are self-evidently related to the better jobs available for individuals with diplomas. This tangible effect is heartening as prisons should ideally serve to rehabilitate convicts for civilian life and not simply punish them for past transgressions while limiting their future career options to more criminal activity.

However, the efficacy of prison education is limited compared to improved education for underprivileged segments of society. The research on education while incarcerated is dwarfed by studies on the primacy of education before the onset of criminal activity. A good example of this would be the persistently high crime rates among inner city youth who do not have access to good public schools. Those who fail to graduate from high school have drastically higher rates of later criminality ranging from burglary to robbery to violent crimes. If a student is supported in their studies, they have no need to turn to crime later in life to make ends meet. Once a convicted felon, even for the rare individuals who earn a degree, it is difficult to find good work later.

In conclusion, the unequivocal benefits of prison education reform do not justify its priority over more impactful educational measures. There should be a degree of balance but the most efficient solution should invariably receive the most resources.

Analysis

1. Research has shown that educational level is a key determiner of potential criminal behaviour, leading many to suggest reorienting prisons to focus on helping inmates earn degrees. 2. In my opinion, this approach would be ineffective relative to other measures.

  1. Paraphrase the overall essay topic.
  2. Write a clear opinion.

1. Reformers point to the bulk of studies supporting this practice. 2. The last 50 years have witnessed a growth in prison programs funded by federal governments and private activists aiding prisoners earning either a high school or university degree. 3. Tracking those who are released with a degree compared to those without has shown a marked decrease in reoffenders among the former group. 4. The reasons for this are self-evidently related to the better jobs available for individuals with diplomas. 5. This tangible effect is heartening as prisons should ideally serve to rehabilitate convicts for civilian life and not simply punish them for past transgressions while limiting their future career options to more criminal activity.

  1. Write a topic sentence with a clear main idea at the end.
  2. Explain your main idea.
  3. Develop it.
  4. State the results.
  5. Finish with the furthest possible results.

1. However, the efficacy of prison education is limited compared to improved education for underprivileged segments of society. 2. The research on education while incarcerated is dwarfed by studies on the primacy of education before the onset of criminal activity. 3. A good example of this would be the persistently high crime rates among inner-city youth who do not have access to good public schools. 4. Those who fail to graduate from high school have drastically higher rates of later criminality ranging from burglary to robbery to violent crimes. 5. If a student is supported in their studies, they have no need to turn to crime later in life to make ends meet. 6. Once a convicted felon, even for the rare individuals who earn a degree, it is difficult to find good work later.

  1. Write another topic sentence with a new main idea at the end.
  2. Explain your new main idea.
  3. Give a specific example.
  4. Develop the example.
  5. Continue with the same example and main idea.
  6. Conclude with a strong statement.

1. In conclusion, the unequivocal benefits of prison education reform do not justify its priority over more impactful educational measures. 2. There should be a degree of balance but the most efficient solution should invariably receive the most resources.

  1. Repeat your opinion and summarise your main ideas.
  2. Add a final thought/detail.

Vocab Highlight

educational level how much you have studied, your degrees

key determiner crucial element

potential criminal behaviour possible criminal actions

leading making

suggest advise

reorienting prisons changing the direction of incarceration

inmates people in prison

degrees certificates

ineffective relative to not as useful compared to

measures actions

reformers people who want to make changes

bulk of studies majority of research

practice institution, way of doing things

witnessed has seen

prison programs jail reforms

funded by given money by

federal governments the national government

private activists not the government, individuals

aiding helping

tracking following

released let out

marked decrease clear fall

reoffenders among the former group people who commit crimes again in the first mentioned group

self-evidently obviously

diplomas certificates

tangible effect clear impact

heartening gives you hope

ideally serve to in a perfect world works to

rehabilitate convicts fix prisoners

civilian life living among normal society

punish hurt

past transgressions mistakes in the past

limiting their future career options not many job opportunities

criminal activity bad behaviour

efficacy how well it works

limited contained

improved education better schools

underprivileged segments of society poorer groups of people

incarcerated in prison/jail

dwarfed made lesser

primacy importance

onset beginning

persistently high crime rates always committing a lot of crimes

inner city youth kids living in the city

access to good public schools can go to good government schools

fail to graduate do not get out of high school

drastically higher rates clearly more of them

later criminality ranging from … to … to after that commit crimes including

later in life when they’re older

make ends meet make enough money

convicted felon incarcerated individual

rare not common

unequivocal benefits clear advantages

priority more important

impactful educational measures effectual policies related to education

a degree of balance some equality

efficient solution cost-effective remedy

invariably always

resources money, time, etc.

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